Who We Are
by Breezeh
Summary: Sometimes, who we are, as warriors, deputies, apprentices, kits, queens, warriors, cats beneath StarClan, comes down to a single moment in time. What makes us, well, us is defined by a day, an hour, or even a second. -oneshot-


**Since I'm leaving FF, I decided to write a quick oneshot celebrating my time here. It's **_**Warriors**_** because, well, this was my first fandom and it's special to me. **

Who We Are

Summary: Sometimes, who we are, as warriors, deputies, apprentices, kits, queens, warriors cats beneath StarClan, comes down to a single moment in time. What makes us, well, _us _is defined by a day, an hour, or even a second.

Dedication: To all my friends on Fanfiction. You know who you are.

_I_

_Bluefur_

Sometimes, who we are, as warriors, deputies, apprentices, kits, queens, warriors, cats beneath StarClan, comes down to a single moment in time. What makes us, well, _us _is defined by a day, an hour, or even a second.

More than anything else, more than a warrior or a leader or a mentor, I am a mother.

"Mother, where are we going?" squeaked the tiny blue-gray kitten at my paws.

"We're going to see your father," I told her. "He's going to take care of you from now on."

"But we're still going to see you, right?" asked her brother. "I mean, you're our mother."

I turned ahead, unable to answer. Nestled between my paws was one tiny kitten, pure white as the frost beneath my feet, sparkling in the light of Silverpelt, was my last kit, coughing and struggling to breathe.

I touched my nose to his head and rubbed it, trying to warm his cold body with the friction. We were so close, nearly to Sunningrocks now. He could hold on just a little longer, of that I was sure.

"Come on," I said, urging the two other kits with my tail. "We're nearly there."

"But it's _cold,_" breathed Mistykit.

"Just a little while longer, and then you'll be safe and warm," I promised.

The dark, cold night was unconvincing, as was the hard frost coating the ground beneath our paws. What was I doing? These kits were so small, so fragile and helpless. They didn't deserve this. Even if it ruined my chances of ever becoming leader, I should just take them back to warmth and comfort. They deserved to have a mother.

But we were so close now.

"Just a little further," I murmured, more to the tiny white bundle beneath me than to anyone else.

I never would have thought that the sharp, pointed stones of Sunningrocks would provide so much comfort, but I breathed a long sigh of relief once they came in sight. I nudged Mistykit and Stonekit further, prodding them with my tail.

"Yes, we're almost here," I mewed. "Come on."

I craned my neck, hoping to see a flash of russet fur behind the cold gray stones, but I didn't catch even a glimpse of Oakheart. A shiver ran down my spine. If he weren't there; if he were late by just a single second…

"Bluefur."

I whipped around. Standing behind me, gaze hard in the night, there he was. The RiverClan deputy, brave warrior, my forbidden mate…the father to my kits.

"You're here," I breathed. _Thank StarClan. _

Oakheart stared down at the tiny furballs, his gaze softening. "And so are my kits. Alive."

I nodded numbly, unable to speak.

"What are their names?"

I nudged the two gray bundles. "Mistykit and Stonekit." My gaze lowered to the white kit, nearly blending with the sparkling frost. "Snowkit."

"He won't make it," he meowed. "Bluefur…"

I shook my head fiercely. "He will, Oakheart. He's strong, just like you. He'll survive."

Mistykit and Stonekit were already hidden beneath Oakheart's dark fur, nearly invisible in the darkness.

"I have to go," he meowed. "Or these two will die." The last sentence was low enough so that Mistykit and Stonekit wouldn't hear.

"Wait~" I hissed, but he was already too far ahead. I watched as his russet form disappeared behind the Sunningrocks, my kits following. I couldn't take my eyes off of them until they disappeared. And then they were gone. My mate, my kits. All I had left was…

A nearly silent mewl caught my attention. I looked down to Snowkit. His eyes were closed, his breathing steadily growing slower. Before I could even manage to rub his fur for some warmth, the slight rise and fall of his chest faltered and he moved no more.

I may be a legendary leader, mentor of the great Firestar himself, but the most difficult thing I've ever had to do is bury my child.

_II_

_Tawnypelt_

Sometimes the most pivotal moment in your life comes complete with a swirling cloud of regrets, and sometimes it doesn't. For me, it never has. Questions, maybe, like why I had to do it, but never regrets.

My blood may be of ThunderClan, but I am a ShadowClan cat at heart.

It was dark outside; there were barely any stars, only a single trail that seemed to direct my path. This was even more evidence that I was doing the right thing, that these stars were guiding me. Leading me to where I belonged.

I got to my paws and padded out of the apprentices' den. Before I turned to leave, though, I had to take one last glance around. At my friends. At my brother. _Goodbye, Bramblepaw_. I thought the words but I didn't dare say them out loud. I wouldn't let myself risk being discovered.

I padded out of camp. Luckily, and somewhat foolishly, no one was awake guarding it. I pushed my way through the bushes, the sound of my own tail trailing against the leaves startling me. _Goodbye, ThunderClan. _I took a final look around—the nursery, where I had slept when I was just a kitten, the leader's den, where I had first talked to Firestar alone, and the warriors' den, where I would never sleep.

I made my way to the Thunderpath, staring across the blackness. My heart thrummed in my chest, but there was no distant thunder sound in the distance, so I hurried across. With each step, the rightness of what I was doing flooded through me.

The unfamiliar, marshy territory felt strange beneath my paws. It was soft and gave way easily, but allowed me to creep silently through the trees. The easy stealth would be easy to get used to, I thought.

A hiss sounded from behind me, and I whirled around. Apparently I wasn't the only one finding it easy to sneak around. My eyes widened automatically, trying to sniff out my follower.

A white cat, easily visible in the darkness, stepped out from behind a shrub. Blackfoot. "What are you doing here, ThunderClan scum?" he hissed.

"Funny that you don't call your new leader is 'ThunderClan scum, too,'" I replied, my fur bristling.

Blackfoot's eyes adjusted to the darkness, widening as he got a glimpse of me. "Tawnypaw?"

I dipped my head in a nod.

He narrowed his eyes. "So you've decided to heed Tigerstar's words and join us? Wise decision."

I lifted my head. "So, planning on taking me to camp any time soon?"

"Of course," he said, beckoning me with a jerk of his head. "This way."

I followed him through the trees until we arrived. The camp was well-hidden behind decaying fallen trees and mossy rocks. He parted a shrub with his enormous black paws and held the way open for me to enter.

"Wait here," he ordered, pointing to a spot in the center of camp. I sat down, wrapping my tail around my paws. I couldn't help gazing anxiously around. Of course, it was late at night and no cat would be awake, but still, it was all I could do to keep myself from a fit of nervousness should anyone see me.

A few moments later, Tigerstar's great form pushed his way out of his den, a rock formation hidden by brambles. He stared at me, narrowing his eyes in appreciation.

"Welcome to ShadowClan, Tawnypaw. You've made the right choice."

"I didn't come for you," I meowed. "I came for me."

I may have been nervous, sad, or completely terrified, but I don't regret my choice—not for a single second. Leaving behind a Clan of friends, mentors, and family isn't easy, and I wouldn't have been able to do it if I hadn't known it was right all along. This is my home—and I have unexpectedly found solace in the darkest part of the forest.

_III_

_Tigerclaw_

Look at me. You see a heartless, murderous, traitorous, monster. You may be right about everything else, but I am not heartless. I never have been, though I may have reserved it for only a few—only those who really deserved it.

I am a murderer. But I am also a mate.

"Tigerclaw?"

I spun around to see Goldenflower slowly approaching me, looking timid and…ashamed. Ashamed? What could this beautiful queen have to be ashamed about.

"Yes?" I touched my tail to her cheek.

She hesitated. "Tigerclaw, I…I'm carrying your kits."

This news stopped me in my tracks. "Are you sure? Have you checked with Yellowfang?"

"Yes, this morning. It's…certain." She looked down to her paws.

I moved my tail from her cheek to her chin, lifting her so that she faced me. "Don't be ashamed," I murmured. "Everything will be fine."

Her eyes widened. "How do you know? Fireheart and Bluestar suspect you of treachery, and if anyone found out~"

"The kittypet knows nothing," I growled.

"But~"

I silenced her with a glance. "Everything will be _fine,_" I repeated.

Goldenflower's green eyes were fearful as she looked up at me, looking as innocent as a kit. "How do you know?"

"Because I love you."

She purred. "I love you, too."

I stayed with her. Every night. Every single night, I came to the nursery to see her growing belly and ethereal beauty, basking in it like the light of the sun. She was perfect, and it hurt me to know that every second I was betraying her oldest friend, Bluestar, but I had to do it. You don't understand—the Clan was undermining beneath her rule. I had to do it, to keep her safe. Everything I did had a purpose—_her. _

And then, one tiny, inconsequential thing went wrong, and all my work, everything I had done—gone, with a single sentence.

"Tigerclaw, you are banished from ThunderClan!"

I stared around the camp, seeing every cat's face alive with shock and hatred, the kittypet's eyes narrowed with satisfaction. My gaze turned to Goldenflower, whose face was more painful than all the rest. Her beautiful green eyes glowed with shock and hurt.

I stared at her as my gaze softened ever so slightly, trying to relay the message with my eyes: _I'm sorry._

She looked back at me for a single second, and then she turned away.

Before you judge me, understand. I had a life once, just like you. A perfect one. I have loved, and I have lost. Just like you.

_IV_

_Firestar_

There is no denying that I have quite a legacy behind me. There is no denying that every single cat in the forest knows my name. But I am nothing behind it all without my friends and family.

"I can't do this."

"Yes, you can."

"I can't. I really can't." I began to panic, breathing heavily. "I can't get up there, I~"

Sandstorm looked me straight in the eye. "Yes, you _can. _Look, Firehe—Firestar. You're their leader now, and they need leadership at this time more than anything. You can do this. You have to."

I shook my head. I had received my nine lives less than an hour ago, it seemed. It was too soon. I needed to recover from the shock of seeing all of them—every one of the dead cats that I missed so much—together as warriors of StarClan.

"I am nothing compared to Bluestar."

"She chose you as her successor," mewed Cinderpelt from where she was seated in the corner of the den. "She knows you can do it. You can't let her down."

"That's right," agreed Graystripe, coming up beside me. "You beat Scourge, and Firestar. You're the best leader we have, and they all know it."

I squeezed my eyes shut for a moment, letting their praise wash over me.

"You can do it."

"We believe in you."

"We know you can."

I opened my eyes and stared around at the faces of my friends. Graystripe, standing beside me as he always would. Sandstorm, her fur brushing mine and affection and conviction in her eyes. Cinderpelt, standing firmly at my side despite her lame leg.

"Okay," I meowed. "Let's go."

I stepped outside of my den, into the blinding sunlight, staring at the faces of my Clanmates as they waited, apprehensive, for my words. I leapt up, around the Highrock, and then bounded up on top of it from behind. As I took my place at the top, looking over the faces of all of ThunderClan below me, my heart swelled with pride.

As the sun washed my fur, I remembered the first time that I had stood in this clearing and watched as the rays of light set my orange pelt aglow. And then the chanting started, from somewhere in the front of the crowd, with a voice I recognized as Sandstorm's:

"Firestar! Firestar!"

The repetition picked up and was carried around, the squeaky voices of kits, the deep voices of warriors, the soothing voices of queens and the raspy voices of elders all intermingled as they shouted my name:

"Firestar! Firestar! Firestar!"

I am a leader, but I am more than that. I am a friend, and that's what's most important. You'll only understand the truth of that statement if you have, or ever had, friends yourself. If you don't, then I pity you, and I have one word of advice: go out. Leave the comforts of what you know behind. Find friends. It'll be the best thing you ever do.

**I know it's corny, but I don't care. As my final **_**Warriors **_**fic on Fanfiction, I think some corniness is acceptable. The prose isn't great, because I wasn't as concerned about that as I was with the message. Anyway, for the last time, review!**

**--Breeze**


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